A Marine, as  seen by...

 

Himself: A  handsome, buff, highly trained professional killer and female idol who carries  a finely honed K-Bar, wears a crisp 8-point cammie cover and is always on time due to the absolute reliability of his Seiko digital watch.

 

His Wife: A stinking, gross,  foul mouthed lovable bum who arrives back at home every few months with a seabag full of dirty utilities, a huge Seiko watch, an oversized knife, a  filthy hat and hornier than hell.

 

Headquarters Marine Corps: A  drunken, brawling, HMMWV-stealing, woman-corrupting "cumshaw artist" who wears  a Seiko watch, an unauthorized K-Bar and  a squared-away cover.

 

His  Commanding Officer: A  fine specimen of a drunken, brawling, HMMWV-stealing, woman-corrupting  bullshitter with an incredibly accurate Seiko watch, a finely honed razor  sharp K-Bar and a salty cammie cover.

 

What  others have said:

 

Congress: Marines are  overpaid, overrated tax burdens who are indispensable since they volunteer to go anywhere at any time and kill whoever they're told to kill, as long as they can drink, brawl, steal HMMWVs, corrupt women and sing dirty songs while  wearing cammies, oversized knives, Seiko watches and really screwed-up 8-point covers that

don't look like the Army's.

 

Ronald  Reagan, former President of the United  States: "Some  people live an entire lifetime and wonder if they've ever made a difference in  the world. Marines don't have that problem."

 

General Douglas MacArthur, US  Army: ".  . these Marines have the swagger, confidence and hardness that must have been  in Stonewall Jackson's Army of the Shenandoah. They remind me of the  Coldstream Guards at Dunkirk."

 

Admiral Chester  Nimitz,  US  Navy, on the Marine Corps' battle for Iwo  Jima: "Uncommon valor was a common virtue"

 

General Douglas MacArthur, US  Army: "I have just returned from visiting the Marines at the  front. There is not a finer fighting organization in the  world!"

 

LtCol T R Fehrenbach,  US Army, in "This Kind of War": "The man who will go  where his colors go without asking, who will fight a phantom  foe in a jungle or a mountain range, and who will suffer and die in the midst  of incredible hardship, without complaint, is still what he has always been,  from Imperial Rome to sceptered Britain to democratic America.  He is the  stuff of which legends are made. His pride is his colors and his regiment, his  training hard and thorough and coldly realistic, to fit him for what he must  face, and his obedience is to his orders. As a legionnaire, he held the gates  of civilization for the classical world ... today he is called United States  Marine."

 

An Anonymous Canadian  Citizen: "Marines are about the most peculiar breed  of human beings I have ever witnessed. They treat their service as if it was  some kind of cult, plastering their emblem on almost everything they own,  making themselves up to look like insane fanatics with haircuts so short as to  be ungentlemanly, worshipping their Commandant as if he was a god, and making  weird animal noises like a band of savages. They'll fight like rabid dogs at  the drop of a hat just for the sake of a little action and are the cockiest  SOBs I've ever known. Most have the foulest mouths and drink well beyond man's  normal limits, but their high spirits and sense of brotherhood set them apart  and, generally speaking, of the United States Marines with whom I've come in  contact, are the most professional warriors and the finest men I've had the  pleasure to meet. "

 

General  John  J "Black Jack" Pershing,  US  Army: "The  deadliest weapon in the world is a Marine and his rifle! "

 

General Mark Clark, US  Army: "The  more Marines I have around the better I like it! "

 

General Johnson,  US  Army: "I  can never again see a United States Marine without experiencing a feeling of  reverence. "
 

 Richard Harding  Davis, war correspondent (1885): "The Marines have landed, and the situation is well in hand."

 

A Marine Drill Instructor at  Parris  Island: "Did  you come here just to spoil my beloved Corps, maggot?"

 

A boot camp weapons coach: "To a  Marine, happiness is a belt-fed weapon."

 

LtCol Oliver North, USMC  (ret): "The only people I like beside my wife and kids are  Marines."

 

MajGen J N Mattis, CG,  1st MarDiv - Iraq,  March 2003: "You  are part of the world's most feared and trusted fighting force. Engage  your brain before you engage your weapon.Share your courage with each  other as we enter the uncertain terrain north of our Line of Departure. Keep faith in your comrades on your left and right and Marine Air overhead. Fight with a happy heart and a strong spirit. For the  mission's sake, our country's sake and the sake of the men who carried the Division's colors in past battles -- who  fought for life and never lost their nerve -- carry out

your  mission and keep your honor clean. Demonstrate to the world there is 'No Better Friend, No Worse Enemy' than a United States Marine."

 

Eleanor Roosevelt - 1945: "The  Marines I have seen around the world have the cleanest bodies, the filthiest  minds, the highest morale, and the lowest morals of any group I have ever  seen.  Thank God for the United States Marine Corps."

 

An Anonymous US Marine: "I  recently attended a Kansas City Chiefs football game at Arrowhead Stadium. It  was their annual Veteran's Day tribute so members of all the services were  asked to participate in the festivities. A color guard for the National  Anthem was provided by the Buffalo Soldiers Association. They looked very  sharp in their 1800s-era US Army Cavalry uniforms. Following that, the Navy  parachute team put on an impressive display that brought cheers from the  78,000 football fans in attendance. Shortly thereafter, we were treated to the  truly awesome sight of an Air Force B-2 Spirit stealth bomber flyover as well  as a few other aircraft.  All of these sights -- but especially the B-2  -- were truly appreciated by the crowd who let it be known by their cheers. I expected that was all we would see of the US Military that  day.  I thought we would see a high school or college marching band  during half-time. Few watch those shows anyway because they have to go to the  head or grab another beer during the intermission. Shortly before  half-time, however, I looked down on the sidelines near the end zone and saw  the Marine Corps' Silent Drill Team forming up. 
 
As the half-time show  started, the players left the field and the announcer came on the public  address system to advise us of the Drill Team's performance.  Many of us  Marines have seen these performances in the past and they're always  awe-inspiring. I didn't expect that the large civilian crowd of football fans  would be as appreciative of the Drill Team as they had been of the high-tech  B-2 or the daring of the Navy parachute team. However, I was on the edge of my  seat.  As the Drill Team marched onto the field, the crowd grew  noticeably quieter.  Soon, the team was fully into their  demonstration.  The stadium was absolutely silent.

From high in  the stands' upper reaches where my seats were, I was able to hear the "snap"  and "pop" of hands striking rifles.  Both big screen "Jumbotron"  scoreboards displayed close ups of the Marines as they went through their  routine. As they completed their demonstration and lined up for the  inspection, the crowd began cheering as the Marines twirled their rifles in  impossible fashion.  Then came the inspection.  Again, the crowd  fell silent and watched intently as rifles were thrown, caught, twirled,  inspected and thrown some more. Each well-practiced feat brought a "wow" or  "did you see that?" from those sitting around me.
 

I sat there in silent  pride as I watched my brother Marines exit the field.  A young girl  behind me asked her mother a question about how the Marines learn to do the  things they just did. The mother replied, "They practice long and hard and  they're Marines; they're the best."

SEMPER FIDELIS